Die Erwartung, nach Deutschland zurückzukehren

In der Gesinnung ist mir geblieben, daß ich in Deutschland die Ursprünge der Deutschen Kirche recherchieren wollte, aber nie dazu kam. Zurzeit befinde ich mich in England, wo ich mein Gedächtnis weitgehend verloren habe, nachdem meine Mutter starb. Ich habe in England nichts erreicht und habe glatt vergessen, welches Schicksal mich hierhergebracht hat.

Leider war meine Mutter in den letzten Jahren ihres Lebens aus Gesundheitsproblemen nicht mehr in der Lage, England zu verlassen und in ihre Heimat zurückzukehren, und aus Liebe zu ihr habe ich sie jeden Tag versorgt.

Als sie mich hinterließ, stellte sich die Frage, wie ich mich von einem Land verabschiede, dem ich nichts gegeben und von dem ich nie etwas bekommen habe. Dann fiel mir ein, daß diese Arbeit vor mir steht, in der es darum geht, zu forschen, wie die Kirche am Rhein gegründet wurde und sich in den ersten Jahren, Jahrzehnten und sogar auch in den ersten Jahrhunderten entwickelte.

Die Erinnerung an Deutschland aus ferner Zeit ist mir nie entgangen. Meine Sprachkenntnisse sind nicht mehr das, was sie einmal waren, dennoch erwarte ich den Tag, an dem ich dem Lande meiner Mutter eine noch auszuführende Präsentation über die Gründung der ursprünglichen Kirche anbieten kann.

Die vorhergesehenen Forschungen könnten nur durch einen Arbeitsvertrag entstehen und sind auf jeden Fall auch mit Reisen innerhalb Deutschlands und der Schweiz verbunden. Ich habe weder die finanzielle Möglichkeit noch die Papiere, um dieser Bestrebung entgegenzukommen, und sollte es eines Tages in Deutschland eine Regierung geben, die sich um die Interessen des Landes kümmert, anstatt sie aufzuopfern, bleibt mein Angebot aufrecht.

Since 2018, the German State has told me to get lost and has deliberately forbidden the research into the Rhine Church. They never paid one dime and never answered my requests and instead always made sure I never had any money. They always sacrificed the Rhine Church to the British. Now they can answer for it because I’m not bothering any more.


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